DRGNFSH
Misc and Anomalies
Miscellaneous & Anomalies
The Cases That Defy Categorization
Some complaints refuse to fit neatly into a filing cabinet.
These records cover anomalies, resonance phenomena, reality glitches, unidentified events, impossible paperwork, conceptual hazards, and everything else the Solar Archive could only classify as "someone should probably investigate this."
When the system itself files a complaint...
...it usually ends up here.
MISCELLANEOUS COSMIC COMPLAINTS (MC‑)
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Black Hole
Category: Workplace Hunger
Complaint:
“I need more snacks.”
Sun’s Note:
Stop eating stars.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Comet
Category: Speeding Tickets
Complaint:
“Stop clocking me for going too fast.”
Sun’s Note:
Slow down.
Status: Pending
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Nebula
Category: Body Image
Complaint:
“Mortals keep calling me ‘space dust.’”
Sun’s Note:
You are literally dust.
Status: Acknowledged
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Quasar
Category: Noise
Complaint:
“I am not too loud. Everyone else is too quiet.”
Sun’s Note:
You are extremely loud.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Wormhole
Category: Misuse
Complaint:
“Stop throwing things into me.”
Sun’s Note:
Stop being convenient.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Star Cluster
Category: Overcrowding
Complaint:
“We need more space.”
Sun’s Note:
You’re in space.
Status: Rejected
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Galaxy
Category: Identity Theft
Complaint:
“Stop naming everything after me.”
Sun’s Note:
Talk to astronomers.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Meteor
Category: Reputation
Complaint:
“I am not a ‘space rock.’ I am a celestial traveler.”
Sun’s Note:
You are a rock.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Supernova Remnant
Category: Emotional Trauma
Complaint:
“I exploded once. Stop bringing it up.”
Sun’s Note:
It was dramatic.
Status: Acknowledged
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Dark Matter Cluster
Category: Visibility
Complaint:
“No one can see me.”
Sun’s Note:
That’s the point.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Black Hole
Category: Hunger
Complaint:
“I need more stars.”
Sun’s Note:
No.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Comet
Category: Tail Maintenance
Complaint:
“My tail keeps shedding.”
Sun’s Note:
That’s normal.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Nebula
Category: Identity
Complaint:
“Stop calling me ‘pretty gas.’”
Sun’s Note:
You are pretty gas.
Status: Acknowledged
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Quasar
Category: Volume
Complaint:
“I am not too loud.”
Sun’s Note:
You are deafening.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Wormhole
Category: Overuse
Complaint:
“Stop throwing trash into me.”
Sun’s Note:
Stop opening near D‑Squad.
Status: Pending
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Star Cluster
Category: Overcrowding
Complaint:
“We need more space.”
Sun’s Note:
You are literally in space.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Galaxy
Category: Naming Rights
Complaint:
“Stop naming everything after me.”
Sun’s Note:
Talk to astronomers.
Status: Closed
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Meteor
Category: Reputation
Complaint:
“I am not a ‘space pebble.’”
Sun’s Note:
You are.
Status: Denied
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: A Supernova Remnant
Category: Trauma
Complaint:
“Stop calling me ‘the aftermath.’”
Sun’s Note:
It fits.
Status: Acknowledged
Complaint MC‑
Filed By: Dark Matter
Category: Visibility
Complaint:
“No one can see me.”
Sun’s Note:
Correct.
Status: Closed
The Graffito Anomaly
The Only Recorded Escape from Purgatoria
Officially, no soul has ever escaped Purgatoria.
The Solar Archive maintains that the transition between Life and the Afterlife is absolute.
Unofficially...
there is one sealed exception.
The individual's identity remains classified. His Cat Tag disappeared from the Registry, his case file was sealed, and every official connected to the incident has declined to comment.
What little survives suggests only this:
He refused to let death separate him from someone he loved.
Against every known law of emotional physics, he repeatedly crossed back into Life, found allies who could somehow perceive him, and accomplished the impossible.
He escaped.
The incident sent shockwaves throughout the Ancient Pillar system, leading to sweeping changes in Purgatoria's security protocols, Cat Tag encryption, parole procedures, and dimensional travel regulations.
Modern sunset curfews, apple-travel restrictions, cherub surveillance, and numerous afterlife safety measures all trace their origins to this single case.
Within the Resonance Civil Service, the event is quietly known as The Graffito Anomaly.
The official record ends with a single unresolved question:
"If one soul escaped... what prevents another?"
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